Assalamualaikum,
You’ve made it to Day 5.
That alone says something about your heart. MasyaAllah
This journey of caring for aging parents isn’t just about physical tasks.
It’s about emotional weight.
It’s about emotional weight.
Family tension.
Quiet sacrifice.
And doing it all while staying spiritually grounded.
Today, we want to leave you with
3 best practices that will carry you through...
(especially when things get messy, painful, or confusing.)
Best Practice #1: Accept, Don’t Force
∙
You will try your best.
You will set routines.
Offer solutions.
And often times…
your parent will resist
.
They’ll refuse diapers.
Refuse to go toilets.
Say no to walks or therapy.
Reject schedules.
And it’ll hurt.
What to do:
- Don’t take it personally
- Step back, reassess, and adapt
- Cry if you need to — then reset your intention and try again
Why this helps:
You’re not managing a project.
You’re honouring a person.
Acceptance creates peace — even without perfection.
Best Practice #2: Stop Blaming. Start Updating.
Most caregiving breakdowns don’t come from illness.
They come from family drama.
Siblings fighting.
Guilt-tripping. Silent treatment.
What works:
- The main caregiver must update others regularly
- Use voice notes if needed: “Mak is like this now. If you’re not ready to help, it’s okay — just be honest.”
- Keep it factual. Keep it calm.
Why this helps:
It sets boundaries. Removes assumptions.
And shifts the focus from
emotion
to
collaboration
.
Easy said that done. I know.
Make this your niat.
Best Practice #3: Remember: This Is Akhirah Work
There’s no trophy. No promotion.
But the reward is eternal.
The Prophet ﷺ said (paraphrasing):
“Your mother, your mother, your mother... than your father...”
(Bukhari & Muslim)
Not just to honour her — but to remind you:
This is a sacred path.
Why this helps:
- Gives you time to breathe
- Helps your parent socialize and move
- Prevents long-term resentment and burnout
Every diaper changed.
Every spoon of food.
Every soft reply in the face of anger.
Every spoon of food.
Every soft reply in the face of anger.
It’s recorded. Rewarded. Loved by Allah. Allahumma Amin.
There is no du'a, no amalan, accept you and your actions.
You were chosen for this role. Not because you’re the strongest.
But maybe… because you’re the most sincere.
Save this email. Forward it.
Bookmark the ones before it.
And if you ever feel like giving up — go back to Lesson 1.
You don’t have to do this perfectly.
Just consistently.
With love. With *ihsan*.
Wassalam,
Shahib & Azura
LegasiSyurga.com